You all know I had to bring the other side of this love thang to the table. I've been in love before and lost it. Because of that one time that was so good, and yes I messed up and have been messing up since then, I find it hard to fall i love again. I had a conversation with a Straight at work yesterday about how the older we get, the harder it is to build a relationship because we have to peel through so many layers of old relationships and hurt. Now if that's not the truth, I don't know what is. I know that I have build my layers over the years and it's not fair to me nor others. I want all the writers of the Perception Lounge to write about this. What are some layers that others have to go through to be able to get in a successful relationship? What are your layers? I'm going to kick it off with talking about my layers. My first layer to even be considered would be to be able to show me attention, initiate, or bring excitement to the table. I've been spoiled in my past relationships and had all of these so it is a must. Secondly, they have to build my trust. This layer comes from all areas, my mom was the start of me not trusting people. Next there was the dating phase that I went through recently. During that dating phase, I dated several dudes that either tried to sleep with my friend or wanted to be exclusive but still do their thing on the side without me knowing. Last but not least that directly relates to the first too things is communication. I've dated people who do not know how to communicate and my friends say that I tell too much sometimes. Learn how to be genuine and communicate what you want, how you feel, and when you want something. To wrap it back around to the main topic, perfect man, if someone could break through my layers, genuine,love nice,not fem, and communicate, that's my perfect man.
CARELESS LOVE
Sorry for the rambling in advance...Why is finding the right person so hard? It seems that I meet people that I feel that it should work with but it doesn't...Is it me? Or them? Or a shared malfunction.?...I so agree with the layers/ the walls we put up to protect our heart...but from what..the pain of getting it broken...in doing so we (I) also prevent myself from the joy of having it filled and overflowing with passion and excitement another man can bring. I'm very cautious of people which stems from my family and previous relationships...I'm slow to let people close and even slower to reveal my true self...I prefer people not to realize how quirky and strange I am until at least the 10th date LOL...But being the nice quiet mysterious conservative hasn't done me well either...So should I just let go and let be what will be or do I continue to let my petals open in their own time when I feel that I'm opening up to man that will embrace the true me like the sun...Which is a part of communication...how can I talk to a person openly until I know they will receive what I'm saying in its intended manner...And if the person I'm talking to seems to be focused on a past love how can I ever feel that he will be one day be focused on me and not the one that got away...for me that shuts communication down quickly...I have so much more on my mind but I will stop for now...
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